Negative Thoughts Suck!
When life is throwing negative shade your way, suit up and remember there is always a little superhero inside of you waiting to kick ass and take names.
It was a Monday. Go figure. Something about Mondays and people’s perceived notions about them seems to give merit to the odds that a bad day will occur on a Monday.
How we define bad days is different for all of us. I define a bad day as any day that I really struggle to reign in my emotions, or let my negative thoughts suck me so dry I just want to crawl in bed and call it a day.
Seriously, If we let them, emotions can be like Spain’s “Running of the Bulls” and we are the giant red flag just lingering in the path of total annihilation.
I was aware of my impending mood before I even walked out the door that morning.
My kids started my day off by arguing before school and the new puppy managed to eat a stick of butter and four cupcakes off my kitchen counter. I blame the children for leaving them out in the first place, and not keeping an eye on the puppy.
[bctt tweet=”If we let them, emotions can be like Spain’s Running of the Bulls and we are the giant red flag just lingering in the path of total annihilation.” username=””]
My gas light came on as I was driving to work. These were just the little things. The day’s circumstances grew darker, and my emotions were running amok.
By the time I pulled into my driveway Monday evening, I was fighting back tears. FYI, I am not a cryer for the most part so that should tell you just how tested I was feeling this fine day.
I sucked it up and went inside to make my children some dinner, stammered through the homework, housework, and general routine of the evening.
When I finally collapsed into my bed, I was fully aware of how out of alignment the whole day had been. I couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment I lost my composure but I think it was somewhere around lunch when I spotted someone who means a whole lot to me but is no longer in my life.
How to Escape Negative Thinking Patterns
So as I lie there in bed, thinking about the day I just trudged through I was reminded of my “about me” page on my blog. The words I so truly mean- about us having more miracles, more good days than bad, a life of general wellness if you will.
Monday, I failed myself. But more importantly, I forgive myself.
See, we will always have days that get the better of us. If we truly work on personal development and self-worth we can have far more days surfing the high tide and fewer days getting barrel-rolled.
So Monday I got crushed by some waves. I could choose to wallow in it and stay in the barrels a few more days or forgive myself for losing grip on my emotions and hop back on the surf.
Related Reading: Staying Positive When Life Just Sucks
Don’t hear me wrong here.
There is a time and a place to totally allow your emotions to flow and go as I like to say. Especially positive ones. But with the negative ones, you gotta be careful that you are working through them and not letting them work you over.
If your negative thinking becomes a pattern, your fighting a rip-current that takes so much longer to get out of than normal.
Have a Pro-Active Strategy to Beat Negative Thinking
So I’m laying in bed realizing that I needed to realign myself before the morning. I could not go to bed, certainly not to sleep, feeling this emotionally drained and down.
Never let yourself go to sleep in a defeated state of mind. Have a plan, to at the very least, bring yourself back to neutral. A good prayer, meditation, affirmations, funny videos, anything to level the storm.
I pulled out my Kindle and opened my email. Waiting like a crackerjack prize in my inbox was a link to Gabby Bernstein’s webinar that I had not been able to watch the last three days because I was a little swamped.
It was already 11:00 p.m. but I didn’t care. I powered through 90 minutes of her inspirational message. I turned the light back on and pulled out a notebook to take notes and breathed a deep feeling and wonderful sigh of relief as I forgave myself for having a “bad day”.
[bctt tweet=”Never let yourself go to sleep in a defeated state of mind. Have a plan, to at the very least, bring yourself back to neutral.” username=””]
I love the saying, “While in Hell don’t stop for a Hotel”. Forgiving yourself when needed makes it much easier to keep moving forward and look for the four and five-star moments in life.
You Get What You Say Yes To
That was a message of Gabby’s that struck me.
I know this statement to be a complete fact. Even a decade ago when my life was a bit of a mess, I was saying yes to the mess. I allowed and wallowed in my circumstance.
You see, as much as this hurts to say, people are really horrible at taking responsibility for their own lives. It’s easier to blame others, blame God, blame our circumstances or luck.
Of course, people will hurt you, screw you over, and life will throw you things you didn’t ask for.
However, how we react to every single circumstance is completely within our control. We can choose to play the victim and always be on defense letting life “happen to us”.
Or, you can be the Captain and call the shots. Sure the other team might throw a few elbows but at any time you can call a timeout or just forfeit. That’s right. You don’t have to stay in a situation or walk a path that isn’t serving your best interests.
So next time your inner voice starts talking crap, change the channel. This takes practice but it’s totally doable. Your friend is playing mind games? Refuse to engage and simply walk away until she returns to her senses. Boss is using you, find something else. Don’t make excuses why you are stuck. You are only stuck if you choose to stay stuck. You get what you say yes to.
4 Ways to Overcome Negative Thinking
These are the four ways I have found that best help me derail negative thoughts and put myself back on a path of optimism. Steal them, tweak them, or please share in the comments below a few of your own tried and true methods.
Affirmations
Affirmations have made a huge difference in my outlook, especially in the last year. I’m the first to admit that I was not buying into this whatsoever when I first started. So what worked for me, was putting in some earbuds and listening as I fell asleep. Basically subliminal programming, which I did have a little faith in because of my knowledge of advertising. First, make sure you find something that soothes you and doesn’t annoy. Second, make sure the messages are relevant to what you need to be hearing. They make affirmations for confidence, wealth, health, happiness, releasing negative thoughts, etc.
Spend time with someone who seems to “be on top of things”.
Sometimes we need to “catch” positivity. Being around people who have a habit of getting things to go their way is a like a good science experiment. Don’t approach it with jealousy. Go in with an inquisitive and open mind. Be a sponge. Soak it in. Let it rub off. Whatever phrase you choose, just don’t start comparing yourself. They aren’t better than you. They are simply in the flow, and you should relax and stop fighting the current.
Thumb through my vision book.
So some people have vision boards. Mine is a notebook that I have written in, pasted pictures into, cutout magazine clips, etc. This is my little book of dreams, hopes, manifestations, and goals. I like pictures because they instantly take you to a good memory or remind us of a dream quickly.
Watch Some Inspiration
Have you ever heard of the website called faithtap.com? I love this site.
If you are not a person of strong faith, do not worry there are videos for everyone on this site. But basically, every video is encouraging, uplifting, or heartwarming. They are showcasing the best of humanity in a world that broadcast bad news and tabloid gossip at pandemic speeds. Consider this website to be a dose of good medicine. Some of the videos are just plain funny but everything on this site is family friendly.
So if you have any of your own please share below! Hope this helps.
xoxo-Deanna
Related Reading: Overthinking and 7 Ways to Change It.